Wintery Knight

…integrating Christian faith and knowledge in the public square

Friday night funny: Daily Show, roommates, Wolf Blitzer, Google

First, left-wing radical Jon Stewart mocks media bias on ACORN! I don’t like him at all, but this is funny.

A funny list for Owen

The list of 101 things to do to your college roomate.

My favorites:

12. Every time you wake up, start yelling, “Help! Where am I?!” and run around the room for a few minutes. Then go back to bed. If your roommate asks, say you don’t know what he/she is talking about.

26. Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantula. If your roommate asks, say, “Oh, he’s around here somewhere.”

27. Tell your roommate, “I’ve got an important message for you.” Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can’t remember what the message was. Later on, say, “Oh, yeah, I remember!” Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

44. Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

52. Scatter stuffed animals around the room. Put party hats on them. Play loud music. When your roommate walks in, turn off the music, take off the party hats, put away the stuffed animals, and say, “Well, it was fun while it lasted.”

57. Start dressing like an Indian. If your roommate inquires, claim that you are getting in touch with your Native-American roots. If your roommate accuses you of not having any Native-American roots, claim that he/she has offended your people and put a curse on your roommate.

78. Set up about twenty plants in an organized formation. When your roommate walks in, pretend to be in the middle of delivering a speech to the plants. Whisper to them, “We’ll continue this later,” while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.

89. Drink lots of lemonade. Talk obnoxiously for hours about how much you love lemonade. Then, one day, paint your face yellow. From then on, complain about how much you hate lemonade.

96. Make pancakes every morning, but don’t eat them. Draw faces on them, and toss them in the closet. Watch them for several hours each day. Complain to your roommate that your “pancake farm” isn’t evolving into a self-sufficient community. Confide in your roommate that you think the king of the pancakes has been taking bribes.

#96 is my all-time favorite. This is for Owen, who loves to read lists of funny things.

Wofl Blitzer on Jeopardy

Third, ECM sends me these videos of CNN’s Wolf Blitzer failing miserably on Jeopardy.

Excerpt:

Richter won the game with an incredible $68,000 total. Delaney racked up an creditable $9,300. But Wolf’s final score was -$4800. Yes, negative $4,800.

It’s very difficult for a Jeopardy contestant to come up enough wrong answers to go that far in the hole. It takes great effort and even greater ignorance.

I think that the left-wing media are probably the least educated and informed people on the planet.

Giant bird hounds policemen away

ECM sends this hilarious story. I love birds, but maybe not THIS bird.

Michele Bachmann videos

These are not really funny, but they are fun.

Michele debates with some stupid old men about tariffs:

Michele debates with leftist Geraldo Rivera about health care:

If you want to see and hear more Michele, click here.

Obama discovers the Internet

Last, check out this piece by Scott Ott. (H/T Scrappleface)

Excerpt:

Just a day after White House “green jobs czar” Van Jones resigned amid controversy over his radical views, the Obama administration said it had discovered a new vetting tool called “Google” that also revealed that the president’s “public option” health insurance proposal may be socialist as well.

“You just type a few words into this rectangle,” said White House press secretary Robert Gibbs, “Click a button and information suddenly appears on your computer screen. When we did that, we were shocked to learn that Van was a socialist, and that the keystone of the president’s health reform plan probably is too.”

Happy Friday!

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